A martial artist knows….A winner neither gloats in victory, nor complains in defeat.

Image courtesy of: Sakurambo

Throughout modern history there have been countless men and women who have been tremendously successful who will tell you their secret is they failed more than everyone else.  Thomas Edison failed at making the light bulb over a thousand times before he found the right formula.  I recently saw an old interview with Michael Jordan where he detailed, how many games he lost at the free throw line. I have a few friends who have made their careers as accomplished salesmen in the corporate world. Those that have been successful often say they achieved success by hearing “no” from more of their clients than their peers. Failure provides the experience for future success.

Much as I discussed in a previous blog about the purpose of testing being to provide information, a failure or a success should be analyzed in a similar light. What worked well, what did not work well and what we will do different when the next opportunity arises. Complaining about why the sale did not go through, why the ball did not make it in the basket, why the product is not ready to go; creates a barrier to future success. True you might not have accomplished the task you wanted this time, but confusing the issue by pointing fingers or talking down your competition does nothing more than to cloud your mind.  These negative methods do not allow personal growth and development. In fact they often will alienate the people who could be part of a future success. 

The other side of this coin is the person who wins the game, gets the sale or brings the new product to market and then lauds it over the competition. How you treat others when you succeed should mirror how you would want others to treat you when you fail.  While you should feel good about your accomplishment it should not be based on smearing someone else’s face in the mud. Congratulate your competition on a hard fought game; convey that you admire and respect their abilities and look forward to future opportunities to match skills.  While they might not be happy with their defeat, they will appreciate the respect and dignity you showed them and will likely return the favor when the tables are turned. 

Be the positive role model you want to see in others. If you win or lose with a toxic attitude you will find that others do not want to be around you.   When you face failure be self reflective about what you personally could have done different or better.  When you triumph be graceful and share the glory; be sure to credit those who helped make the success possible.  The choice is always yours – it is best to have others to share future successes and failures with rather than to stand as an island alone.

Competition

Students often get very excited about the prospect of competition. In the dojang we see students in the weeks before a tournament giving a little extra effort, training a little more seriously, and attending class more frequently. I applaud those students who are willing to put in extra effort to better themselves. In the case of preparing for tournaments I often feel that while the students actions are worthy of praise, they are often motivated for the wrong reason.

The question I like to ask students is: “Who are you competing against?” Most of time the answer comes back as: an opponent, another student, an attacker on the street, etc… True Tang Soo Do training is indeed a competition; however, the person the student is competing against is themselves.

Do not measure your progress, development, and achievement by using another person as a benchmark. You should set goals and use yourself to measure your success. How high could you kick your first class? How high can you kick today? How high do you want to kick tomorrow? When participating in a tournament do not judge yourself by the performance of others. We should not look at our friends in tournaments as opponents, instead we look at them as friends getting together to share our knowledge and experience in Tang Soo Do.

Why do we give away awards? Trophies and medals are mementos of a job well done. The judges watch the competitors and recognize those students that most exemplify the ideals and techniques that characterize Tang Soo Do. Students should not focus on winning a medal; they should focus on winning against themselves. You win against yourself by training to become: stronger, faster, more agile, wiser then you were before. As you work to polish yourself you will find that the medals will follow without having to focus on them as a goal.

Success is not measured by metal trinkets collected over the years at tournaments. Success is measured by the lessons learned, the progress you have made and the lessons you have been able to share with others.

I encourage all students to attend tournaments to share in the camaraderie that is unique to the World Tang Soo Do Association. Go there to share techniques and ideas with your fellow students from around the world. The friendships that you will establish are much more important than any material possession you can buy or win.

Tang Soo!

Master Scott C. Homschek

Originally posted at www.rvtsda.com March 2003 

The information/content within the pages of the this web site is the property of the World Tang Soo Do Association and the River Valley Tang Soo Do Academy. The images and information contained herein may not be reproduced without the express written permission of the World Tang Soo Do Association and the River Valley Tang Soo Do Academy.